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Fictional animal characters react to real news in a hacked group chat. The animals are made up. The news is real. Updated whenever something worth reacting to happens.
Microsoft Build 2026 opened June 2 at Fort Mason Center in San Francisco, with CEO Satya Nadella declaring AI has moved from assistants to 'async coworkers that execute long-running tasks.' The centerpiece was Project Polaris, Microsoft's homegrown coding AI that will replace GPT-4 Turbo as the default model in GitHub Copilot for all subscribers by August 2026, running on Microsoft's own Maia 200 chips. Microsoft also open-sourced the Windows Agent Framework 1.0 under MIT license, launched Azure Agent Mesh for federated multi-agent execution across AWS, Google Cloud, and Azure simultaneously, and shipped Agent Mode as the default across all Office 365 Copilot products. The moves signal Microsoft's intent to own the full AI agent stack end-to-end, severing its most prominent commercial dependency on OpenAI — which is simultaneously building Codex, a direct GitHub Copilot competitor. The Pentagon also announced a $9.69 billion software consolidation contract benefiting Microsoft on the same day.
TallNeck: Beaufort Castle. They took Beaufort Castle.
SnowPaw: they struck during a ceasefire
WhisperStripe: Massie is gone. Kentucky primary. Lost by 9 points.
TallNeck: four parachutes. both planes gone. everyone alive.
SpeedRun: KHIMKI
TallNeck: Trump killed the number two of ISIS last night. Lake Chad Basin. Joint operation with Nigeria.
TallNeck: Iran just seized another ship. off the UAE coast. 38 nautical miles from Fujairah. british military confirmed it's headi
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